Friendship: Finding your Squad

I don’t know if I would say that I have a hard time making friends, but I do have a hard time keeping them. Like most, I have seen people (“Friends”) come and go. Fake friends have taught me valuable life lessons about trust and the mistakes that I made along the way. Really I should thank all the fake friends that have come my way because they have helped to become a better person. Friendships, whether good or bad, helped me to learn what I needed from these relationships and also how to be a more sensitive and supportive friend to someone else.

Although I am still learning a lot, and hope to always learn more, here are some key things that I learned so far about friendship:

1. Less is More

Juggling a bunch of different people can get messy and be exhausting as well. Sometimes it may be best for everyone if your focus is on less people and you aren’t spread so thin.

2. Me Time

When you vibe well with another person it can be tempting to want to spend a little more of your time with that person. Keep in mind that having time to yourself or just away from your friend can make your relationship stronger. Oh, and then they won’t find you annoying (lol jk, kinda)

3. Two-way Street

Any time you have a true friend they will care about you. Friends should not make you feel bad or undervalued. That is not a friend. Friends won’t encourage you to makes poor decisions either. These type of relationships are toxic. Friends should take interest in things you’re passionate about even if they cannot relate. Friends should encourage and inspire, and even challenge you to be a better you, not another them.

10 Reasons MY Friends are Awesome (a summary)

  1. You make me laugh
  2. You listen
  3. You don’t judge
  4. You think I’m cool
  5. We have fun doing nothing
  6. We are comfortable around each other
  7. You inspire me and challenge me to be more 
  8. Our differences complement each other
  9. We can talk forever
  10. You call me out in my bull💩 to my face, and I can do the same

I hope that all of you have friends that improve your life and make you laugh.

Share this post with your friends and let them know how special they are to you.

-Endia XO💋

P.s.

Special thanks to my friends for your love and support. I appreciate your help and want you to know that you are a special part of my life. ❣️

Happy Valentine’s Day: From Us

In the spirit of Valentine’s Day, I asked my boyfriend to collaborate with me on this post. We decided to do our own “Top 10 List” for the Holiday so before you head out with that special someone read this Top 10 Valentines Day Ideas for Couples. The “Guys” section is his top five ways to get brownie points for the fellas, and the “Girls” section is my top 5 ways to basically not mess anything up when you can see he is trying to make you happy. (This post is best read if you read his number 1, her number 1, his number 2, her number 2, etc.)

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Natural Hygiene Haul

I have been working hard trying to bring you something new. I’ve been considering making some changes to my lifestyle in order to reduce my toxic load. Today I have a video for you to check out. Watch to see what I got during my natural hygiene haul.

 

National Popcorn Day

Today is National Popcorn Day! I don’t know about you, but I am excited for my favorite popped corn snack. I rarely get to enjoy Popcorn but when I do it has to be gourmet (or at least feel like it). 

For this special day I will be making a family throwback. When we were younger my sister first made this for me and I have been hooked ever since.

It is the easiest, yummiest treat that will tickle your tastebuds today. For this recipe you will need:

Popcorn, fresh popped bag or other (must be hot)

Snickers (minis work best)

Instructions:

Unwrap the mini snickers bites and drop them into the hot popcorn. Hold/ seal the bag/ container shut and shake so that melted chocolate will coat the popcorn. Enjoy! 

Let me know what you think of this snickers popcorn recipe. 

Happy Popcorn Day,

Endia XO 💋

10 Natural Hair Staples

#10 Wide tooth Comb      

This tool allows for easy detangling that can be quicker than finger detangling. Wide tooth combs can do minimal damage when used gently, but they can also cause snagging and damage if you are not careful. Beware and use with care. I plan to invest in a wide tooth wooden comb without the seams. The seams in plastic combs can cause breakage.

#9 Bobby Pins & Hair clips

Bobby Pins help to secure styles and even temporarily hold hair in place without the use of rubber bands (e.g. bantu knots). Clips are great for when the hair needs to be put into sections for easy manipulation. Again, you must beware. Chipped paint on bobby pins, and seams, cracks, chips, springs, and broken claws on hair clips can cause breakage. One of the things I dislike the most about bobby pins is how chipped paint pieces can end up in my hair.

#8 Eco Styler Gel

Gel is usually only thought of when it is necessary to smooth or mold hair, but this gel can be used for several things such as smoothing, styling twists and Bantu knots, frizz control, and much more. There are now quite a few styles (like these above) that can last even longer with the use of eco styler gel. Some of my favorite uses include smoothing baby hair and shingling in the summer time.

#7 (Deep/Leave-In) Conditioner

Leave-in conditioners help in keeping the hair properly moisturized and can also aid in detangling. Having a deep conditioner in your hair regimen is vital. Most deep conditioners will be used with indirect heat. This allows for deeper penetration into the hair shaft and that means longer lasting moisture. That is essential for textured hair! Aim to deep condition approximately once a week.

#6 Hair ties (Elastic)

This is a tough one. We need hair ties to put our hair up and out of the way. However, many of these can do more harm than good. My absolute favorite hair tie to use is a satin hair scrunchie which I DIY. I have also made them using velvet which would be my next choice. My third option would be store bought satin scrunchies which are horribly difficult to find in store. I would recommend looking on a site like Etsy or SatinLined Caps if you aren’t in the mood for a DIY. Thus the issue at hand arises. It is almost impossible to find some of the better hair tie options in store. I did find a type of hair tie that is like a stretch silicone material. It is almost seamless and is not coated in fabrics. This is nice for tighter ponytails, but I had a hard time finding them in black in stores.


#5 Headbands, Head wraps, Scarves & Turbans

I used to wear a lot of scarves and turban-like styles but if we are honest then we would admit that they have a time and a place. It can be challenging to fit these protective styles into our daily lives. Now I incorporate more head wraps and headbands. Try to select non-cotton materials as cotton can cause snagging and breakage around the edges of your hair. Scünci makes some different options that are great in the active collection.

#4 Moisturizer

Moisture equals water. No other product will take it’s place. It is a necessary component to healthy hair. External moisture is important but one could argue that proper hydration is even more important. Just go for both! Make sure you drink your water and also refresh hair with water so that your hair is hydrated from the inside out.

#3 Oils

Oils and butters help to seal moisture into the hair. Ideally you would want to use these after moisture so the water doesn’t sit on top of the oils and butter. Not all oils are sealants. Oils and butters can also add shine and reduce frizz. The heavier butters can also help to smooth hair and tame edges. Before use, do your research and pay attention to what your hair needs.

#2 Products (for curly hair or otherwise)

It is so easy to become a product-junkie in the world of natural hair. There are an endless amount of products that do this and that, and we want to see what works. Make sure you cleanse well and remove all of the product from your hair. It can weigh you hair down and make it hard for your hair to absorb moisture properly. Have fun with hair products, but again listen to your hair. It will tell you if something is not welcomed there.

#1 Bonnet, Satin scarf/ Pillow

Last but not least, the bedtime hair wrap up. Protecting our hair at night is important to keep hair healthy and retain length. There are a lot of nighttime protective options, and the one you choose may depend on your current style. Our normal pillowcases, sheets, comforters and even pajamas can snag our hair and break pieces off. If you notice little pieces of hair in your bed it may be time to change the way you protect your tresses while you’re sleeping.

Bonus:: Neat manicured nails are important when caring for your hair. Breakage is a huge pain in the butt and you don’t want to cause any more. Make sure you keep it cute girl.

Comment below with any hair item you cannot live without.

See you soon,

Endia XO 💋

Gallery

Mistakes & Epic Fails: COLOR ME CRAZY

Let me first say that color doesn’t have to be an “epic fail” if you properly care for your hair. IF! I started with boxed hair color when I was in high school. I have always had natural (non-relaxed) hair so I felt that color was a safe way to have fun with my hair without the extra precautions. That is where I failed.

Hair color is a fun way to express yourself. I have definitely expressed myself over the years. I have been every color from brown (a lighter shade than my own), blue, blonde, black, blue-black, purple, magenta, and green. I have definitely had my fair share or colors. The wilder the better. My favorite was definitely magenta… good times.

Between heat styling and coloring my hair without proper care, my hair grew but it wasn’t healthy. My curl pattern loosened and my hair looked stringy. However, I did not notice or care because I had yet to embrace natural hair styling/care, or even know what that meant. As long as my hair was still long I was #winning, right? I had no problems cutting it either. It was just hair. It would grow. That’s what hair does.

I never had a stylist tell me my hair was unhealthy when I was going on a regular basis, and paying them more money to color and/or cut my hair. It wasn’t until I stopped going to stylists regularly that I heard reports of how my hair needed this type of treatment or that kind of deep conditioning treatment. The question I always wanted to know was how much? The question I started to ask myself was did they even know the difference or was it all about the coins?

The last color I put in my hair was purple (circa 2013). I was covering the faded magenta, and I had just had all the damage that it had caused cut out. I’m not sure how it happened or even why, but soon I embarked on a natural hair journey of my own. I wish I could say that since then I have not faltered and that I have a ridiculously long mane, but that is false. I still struggle with my natural hair and understanding what it needs from me to get to the ridiculously long mane that I desire. It wasn’t the first time I embraced the natural lifestyle and I’m sure it will not be the last time that I go off track, but every year I hope to improve and in doing so retain length until I am… living the natural dream.

Take care of your color treated hair and do your homework beforehand. Check out the photo gallery below.

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Until next time,

Endia XO 💋

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National Bubble Bath Day

This year I want to do things that make me feel good; pretty, girly things. Things that make me laugh, dance, and smile. I have chosen a selection of not-so-traditional holidays to celebrate this year. Just because they make me smile, and… Today is National Bubble Bath day! So dust off your scented candles and get out your fanciest soap for a dip in your very own tub. Lol, but really this is actually a real holiday. Not like Thanksgiving or anything like that, but it is definitely a time to celebrate.

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EndiaXO Bubbles

Why not take a leisurely soak for no other reason than a holiday celebration? Cool thing is, since you’ll most likely be celebrating alone (or maybe not, idk, whatever floats your rubber ducky) there’s no one to judge you on how fancy or simple you get at bath time. It’s a time to relax and wind down, or just appreciate and care for your self. Choose a nice bubble bath and light a candle, play some music, or read a book. Again, do whatever relaxes you. It doesn’t have to be a long drawn out process. Do what best suits you.
Baths not your thing? Make shower time extra special.

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I am currently reading “I am Victory” by first Lady Victory Vernon

I like candles and a book when I bathe. Afterwards I follow up with a shower and lotion/body oil.

What’s your favorite way to indulge on National Bubble Bath Day?

-Endia XO💋